The Genius of Jersey Shore

May 27, 2011 by Jessica.Leshnoff

Admit it. You’re jealous of the Jersey Shore crew. You probably don’t realize it because your jealousy is so covered up by layers of disgust, annoyance and nausea that it’s actually subconscious by this point. But you are and here’s why:

Because the deeply tanned, highly intoxicated, mostly foul-mouthed twentysomething “stars” of MTV’s breakout reality show smash hit, Jersey Shore, are, most likely, making more money than you. And by “more money,” I mean they’re totally and completely blowing you out of the water.

And it irks you—no, scratch that, it makes you completely irate—because you actually work for a living. And, hell, you’re not getting book deals like Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi and Jenni “JWOWW” Farley just for getting blitzed, sleeping around, doing laundry and having ridiculous nicknames. Heck, Snooki makes $25,000 just for showing up at a party.

“Why do they make all that money!” you wake in the night and yell (okay, you might just silently think that in the middle of the day but whatever).

I’ll tell you why.

After three seasons sucked into a show I solemnly vowed I’d never, ever watch (Just like I vowed I’d never watch any of Bravo’s Housewives series—and we see how well that worked out; it totally didn’t work at all), I started fuming just like you probably are right now and then it dawned on me:

The Jersey Shore crew possesses something very few of us do: The ability to just not give a damn. They possess it in its most rare and pure form. If you watch the show you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Say what you will, but these kids (I call them “kids” but they’re all technically adults, no matter how far-fetched that sounds), despite having cameras in their faces 24/7, are 100% unabashedly themselves. I’m not saying it’s admirable. But it’s true.

They have no airs. They hold nothing back. They do what they want, when they want, and how they want.

Their mantra is: Yo. My friends and family love me for who I am so what the !@#$ do I care what anyone else thinks?

So they party. And dance. And hook up with strangers. And punch each other. And scream. And clog up the toilet.

And they get paid big bucks for it. For simply being their own true-blue, overly coiffed, profanity-spewing, fist-pumping, inhibition-lacking selves. No matter how much viewers shake their heads about it, the ratings speak for themselves: America secretly loves it and continues to beg for more (which it will be getting in the form of season four, filmed in, not the Jersey Shore, but, yes, folks, Italy).

Their catchphrases (“GTL,” “grenade,” “T-shirt time”) have gone viral. The group’s antics and larger-than-life personalities have each cast member making a staggering $100,000 an episode. They have sponsorships like athletes. And they’ll probably wind up in movies soon, too.

I’m not saying it’s right, but that’s the way it is. And no matter how much we might deny it, secretly, in the deepest, darkest recesses of our brains—the area that’s attracted to loud, pulsating music, hair gel and deep, dark tans—we’re not just jealous of their paychecks, we wish we didn’t give a damn either.

Interested in another take? Check out “Is Snooki Ruining Literature?”